What is Three Times Theory?

Walter Iooss

As Polish philosopher Leszek Kolakowski once said, the best way to deal with your need is meeting it. If you want an apple, just go ahead and grab one. And deal with all the consequences.

Generally I share this view, but I think it applies best to first time experiences. I have a simple and special approach towards it. Enter Three Times Theory.

It is based on notion, that everything experienced for the first time is special. But that's not the whole story. Second times are very interesting as well, in my opinion undervalued. And there's this third time, which signals routine.

First time is so mind blowing because you're not able to scale it. What you have at your disposal is at best some partial report, dull info, naked data. That's why when it actually happens it's totally emotional. Even if disappointing, it can hardly be challenged. Suppose you have upgraded your Honda Civic to Lexus. As impressive as this promotion gets, it can't beat your initial jump from walking to driving. Can it?

Second time experience is more scalable. That's because the first time gave you some measures, tangible expectations of its limits, glimpse of insight. Whether it's a second job, second girlfriend or second drug use, comparison comes naturally. It's somehow new, but familiar.

Third time introduces cyclical nature of things, gives you the sense of understanding. From here you start being experienced. 

So happy is, I think, the one who had three houses, three spouses, and three jobs. Hey, but not at once! Let's not praise personality disorders. When you lived three lives, you can call yourself lucky. You've been testing your freedom. That guarantees minimized risk of anxiety, uncomfortable flashes, and insomnia later on. Well, at least it should help.